It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Randomize