I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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