GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
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