i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
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