About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Randomize
