I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
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