For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
You've changed since you got that strap on
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
