I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Randomize
