He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
