Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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