Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
