called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
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