I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
