He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
