i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Randomize
