i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
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