Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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