the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Randomize
