It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
