Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
