The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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