seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
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