Your mouth is God's brothel.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize
