Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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