Is it normal to miss your booty call?
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
