I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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