Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
