only if we run a train.
done.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Randomize
