i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
