I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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