She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
I've blown a few things in my day
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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