Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(919): View more from North Carolina

Yes give me all the cream and he's gone

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(816): View more from Missouri

I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science

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(314): View more from Missouri

The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.

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(914): View more from New York

I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever

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(503): View more from Oregon

im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night

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(216): View more from Ohio

Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.

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(469): View more from Texas

Oh. So it is a cult

(702): View more from Nevada

Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.

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(818): View more from California

Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.

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