i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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