I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
