from now on my penis is your penis
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Randomize
