im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
