He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I just blew my weed a kiss
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
