Whod you bang
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Randomize
