we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize