Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize
