She's JV to your varsity
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
