Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
