I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Will exercising make me less horny?
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