Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
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