Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize