You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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