sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
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