Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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