The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
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