This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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