i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
